Gary Schuller, relationship counsellor

My approach to Relationship Counselling & Couple Therapy

Gary Schuller MS Marriage & Family Therapy

Struggling to love and be loved can take us to the very edge of our hopes and fears. As someone once said, ‘’we are born out of relationship, are wounded in relationship and we can heal through relationship’’.

I know how challenging being part of a couple can be. For over fourteen years I’ve supported couples and individuals working through relationship difficulties and I have found my own search to be an intimate partner the most challenging and rewarding experience of my lifetime.

Relationships can be one of the greatest sources of joy and fulfilment in life. When our relationship is not going well, it can be heartbreaking, we hurt, feel disappointment, experience fear and loneliness.

The truth is, conflict is inevitable in relationships with people we love. I believe how we view the conflict makes a big difference in our ability to work through relationship problems.

I take a positive view of relationships, even the difficult parts. When you're in the middle of a relationship conflict, it's hard to see the difficulties as anything other than negative, but don't throw in the towel! When you think it might be over, it may have just begun.

It may be that your relationship is pushing you to meet the challenge of a new and deeper way of relating. Relationship problems are often opportunities to break out of familiar but unsatisfying, negative patterns, and can lead to individual growth and deeper connections as a couple. I can help you work through a wide range of relationship issues.

My approach to relationship counselling and couples therapy reflects a cutting edge approach and philosophy that over the years many of my individual and couple clients have found supportive and empowering.

What I offer can help couples to:

  • Understand that what looks and feels like the end of love, is often the ending of a relationship phase, not the relationship itself

  • Make sense of relationship difficulties and negative patterns and move through and beyond them

  • Learn to love in a new way that can change and grow as each partner changes and grows

  • "My wife first thought of the idea of going to counselling and we found Gary. We both liked Gary’s straight forward way of listening and identifying with our problems. There was enough trust there to enable both of us to speak completely honestly, whilst the other listened, which was not only incredibly refreshing and something completely new - but enabled us to see something in the other person that made each of us realise that we wanted to rebuild our relationship. We still have a long way to go and we will continue to see Gary to give us the guidance and support we need to continue building our life together"

    – N&H, London (Relationship Counselling)

  • We started seeing Gary shortly after our child was born. Becoming parents fundamentally shook our relationship and surfaced all sorts of issues. We initially met Gary face to face and then transitioned to video calls. Honestly I don’t think we would still be together if we hadn’t embarked on this therapy journey. Seven years on and we still really appreciate our sessions with Gary, helping to strengthen our relationship, navigate the difficult times, and also to become better parents. Having our sessions over video calls in the evening means we don’t have to arrange childcare or travel from our living room - with busy lives and a young child this is invaluable."

    – S&S, London (Online Couples Therapy)

Professional Endorsements

“Gary joined our team at CAMHS, NHS Trust with extensive experience working with couples and individuals in his private practice.

Working with Gary has been an enriching experience for me and the colleagues in the multidisciplinary team here at the NHS Trust.

Gary is a creative and experienced couple, individual and family therapist, who combines warmth, caring and critical thinking to his work with clients as well as colleagues.”

Carmen Garcia
Systemic Family Therapist & Supervisor
Institute of Psychiatry and Neuroscience
King’s College London

“Gary possesses a fine combination of warmth, caring and knowledge of appropriate psychotherapy models to use in varying circumstances.  He has been an excellent member of our organisation.”

Evan Imber-Black, Ph.D.
Internationally renowned family therapist and author.
Director, Marriage and Family Therapy
Mercy College, Dobbs Ferry, New York

Training / Qualifications

  • Master’s Degree Marriage and Family Therapy (Distinction) - Mercy College, New York, 2011

  • 2 Year Specialist Training training in Creative Couple Work - Centre for Gender Psychology & Norwegian Institute of Psychosynthesis (London, Oslo, Norway, 2009-2010)

  • PSI CHI -The International Honor Society in Psychology (2011)

Experience

  • Online Relationship Counselling and Couple Therapy (Private Practice) - 2011-Present

  • Couple & Family Therapist, NHS CAMHS Lambeth, London (2014 - 2018)

  • Couples Therapist, St Pancras Relationship Counselling, London, England (2011 - Apr 2018)

  • Marriage Therapist/ Individual Relationship Counsellor, Volunteer Counselling Services - New City, New York (2010-2011)

We want to begin Relationship Counselling

Let’s schedule a session. Send a booking enquiry to arrange your first session, or arrange a free 20-minute chat to go through any questions before booking.